Monday, January 4, 2010

Farewell, Balls of Fury!

Today is the last day of Roddick's manhood, as I will have him neutered in the morning. Though some may say it's cruel and unnecessary, unfortunately, it must be done. Not only is it good for animal control, it also does the dog wonders. For those of you who don't know, and especially Kyler, who thinks that this means chopping off his penis (no, dude...), neutering is the act of removing the testes from the dog.  The removal of this testosterone center has many health and behavioral benefits, such as preventing testicular and prostate cancer, and removing the urge to mark his terrority (a.k.a. pee on my laundry). It's a non-invasive procedure, and he will barely feel a thing.

And believe it or not, I actually think he knows exactly what's going to happen tomorrow morning. He has been an asshole all fucking day, and refuses to listen to me. Final act of rebellion until the inevitable, I guess... much like taking a crap on a special someone's bed after she found her boyfriend cheating on her!!! (have fun guessing who this one is you guys!).

One good thing about this situation, however, is that Moose won't be able to lick Roddick's balls when they play. For those of you who don't know, Moose is gay. It's weird. This, of course, will be covered in Welcome, Moose (Part 2). Stay tuned.

So finally, as a take away message, as my idol Bob Barker once said "remember to spay or neuter your pets... and fuck bitches"

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